The Postmaster's Questline - Fun, with a useful toy and a new pet!

Yesterday I received a mail from Spanky. In it was an attachment "Lost Mail". I whispered him on battlenet "What's this thing?" He was probably asleep, so I turned to Wowhead instead. And asked trusty ol' HK... who told me to got Wowhead.



Well, I went down to give it to Madam Goya. She seemed rather preoccupied talking to some dwarf down there.


Ah, so the lost mail was gold that the dwarf sent for his kit from the BMAH! Well, after we gave it back, he was all good and all dressed in his armour set.

Kieran Stonebrow: Keep yer paws off me, fuzzball!

I handed the quset in to Madam Goya.

Madam Goya: Ah a bank note. Mr Stonebrow's payment. Just in the nick of time it would seem.
Madam Goya: It seems you're in luck today, Mr Stonebrow. You may take back the goods.
Kieran Stonebrow: Yer damn right I will! I bought this armor fair and square, even if I ain't done payin' for it.
Kieran Stonebrow: Ahh, that's better. Armor befitting a might hero! One whose legendary deeds shake the very foundations of Azeroth!
Kieran Stonebrow: Welp, I'm off to the tavern.


Off he goes in his Dreadnaught armour. Hm, wonder who he is!

I then get a nice mail from the Postmaster, thanking me for my work!


Behind the Magus Commerce Exchange there was a pipe which was the entrance to the mail centre. Very Mario Bros feel as we clicked on it to go down into the busy mail centre!




The Postmaster had a quest for us,  Return to Sender.

You've arrived just in time!
Unlike the mail as of late, I'm afraid.
We are severely understaffed, and demand is at an all-time high. We simply can't keep up!
I'd love to chat, but I need help catching up before I can rest for even a moment.
First thing's first. Several parcels of rejected mail have broken loose again; will you help me round them all up and return them to their senders?

After we have clicked those 9 packages we then had to carry 1362 heavy stone in A Huge Package.

Due to the incredible volume of complaints in recent months we have been barred from delivering s... s... (The Postmaster holds back tears, pain visible in his eyes.)
Solid stone. We're positively swimming in it - if we can't deliver it then pretty soon we will be overwh-
(The Postmaster's eyes light up suddenly.)
That's it!  There is an old Consortium portal not far from here that we could deposit it in with none the wiser!  Can you help, Navimie? The stone is extraordinarily heavy.




Now you walk SUPER slow as you carry those stones. Flying doesn't help nor does mounting up. HOWEVER, if you party up with a friend, you can ride their 2 person mount and go at usual mount speed!
Aimei thought he'd jump on but the weight of the stones + Panda was too much!
Woo! Fast ride!
I read some funny things about this quest. There is a bag of stones to pick up to get your stones. Some people actually went out and bought the stones... and one person even went out and farmed them!!!

I tried to find out the significance of the 1362 Solid stones, and some weird hits came up. Firstly, someone commented on Wowhead about the Vernal Bank in Utah, where it was cheaper to MAIL bricks than it was to move them by commercial freight. So they mailed the bricks, and it cost the post office a fortune! Perhaps this was a reference to that.

The other 1362 and stone reference I found was regarding the Kensington Runestone, a 92kg slab of inscribed stone which was reportedly a record from 1362 by Scandinavian explorers. Since then it's been reported to be a hoax.

So I dumped all that stone in the Consortium portal near the Horde Bank in Dalaran. The Ethereal on the other side is less than impressed...




The next part of the quest is something we're more familiar with. In Priority Delivery, someone forgot to get their loot of Lich King! So off we go to ICC (via a convenient portal from the Postmaster's assistant) and need to get to the body, fighting off some Ethereals who are trying to ninja the loot.


And what do you think they forgot to loot? Invincible's reins??!!

Apparently the guy we have to give it to is hanging out in the Steam Pools at Feralas. When we get there... it's none other than Johnny Awesome (that pain in the ass).


In Service with a Smile, Johnny proceeds to tell me that he's already GOT an Invincible, which is why he didn't bother looting it...

Oh, simple tauren. Simple, simple tauren.
I did not 'forget' to sweep up those reins from that foolish cakewalk of a knight they call the Lich King. I simply did not bother, as I already received the mighty steed during my raid last week.
(Johnny motions to the horse on his left.)
Since you're here and clearly intrigued by my sweltering greatness, won't you take that superfluous stallion to the assistant resort director in town? My coffers could use a bit of extra lining.

The goblin is excited to get the mount and gives us a huuuuge bag of gold.

Gott says: "Pleasure doing business with ya. You just made my freakin' career, pal!"
When I get back to Johnny, he raises his arm exaggeratedly, glancing at his naked wrist.

My, my, quite the LETHARGIC adventurer, aren't you? That just might cover my repair bills from the many dungeons I've plundered.

Now he wants me to take Sparkle's favourite toy and put it on his grave in Hillsbrad Foothills. OK, off I go to do that. And what do you think Sparkle's favourite toy is? MIMIRON'S HEAD.


Back to the mailroom and it's time for the minigame and achievement!


The quest asks us to sort 15 mail to the right mail tubes. There are 6 mail tubes, each named with a continent (Kalimdor, Eastern Kingdoms, Outland, Northrend, Pandaria and Broken Isles). Each letter is labelled with a city and a zone (like Gadgeetzan, Tanaris) and you have to put it in the correct mail tube (Kalimdor). Finish this quest and you get The Total package achievement, which gets you the Katy Stampwhistle toy (yay mailbox toy!)


There are 2 achievements to get from the minigame. If you do 30 mail in 60 seconds, you get the Post Haste achievement, which gets you the pet, Mailemental! If you do 30 mail with partial addresses (ie no zones, just the city) then you get the Priority Mail achievement which rewards you a title as well (The Postmaster).

I just kept trying the partial addresses because doing that successfully will get me BOTH achievements. I did it for aaages.


There are lots of things that people used to help them - there was a weak aura (which I didn't try), I just kept trying to persist. I made a list of the cities I couldn't remember to help me to remember. I was sure I could do it!

Sorting the cities I kept forgetting into Alphabetical order and then doing the game helped me the best. After a while, I could remember where the cities where and didn't have to use my cheat sheet so much.


So after it's all done, you get a letter you can give to your friend (chain mail anyone?) and they can do the quest too! Or, you can look around post boxes and find one on the ground. Note, these ones on the ground are BOP whereas the ones you give away are Bind on use, so don't go trying to pick one up! You actually can't pick up the letter if you've already done it, which is good, I suppose!

See the letter!
Good luck and happy mail sorting!

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