Monday, September 10, 2012

Diary of a WoW Griefer

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction.  Any resemblance to events, real or imagined, are purely coincidental.  

I've got the day off school today, so I thought I would spend the day playing WoW.  Mum's gone to work so I've pretty much got the house to myself.

So I login and thought I'd just get some early morning farming done.  It's awesome being a herb/miner.  Makes heaps of money at the auction house, and I can totally bug out the nodes there by tapping the nodes and herbing and leaving behind the lifegiving seeds.  My bags were full so I tapped all the mines so I could go back to Orgrimmar and bank my stuff and then come back and get all the nodes.  It stops new ones from spawning too!  And I flag myself near the nodes so if Alliance accidentally tap me and get flagged my pet can get them.

Off to Molten Front to do my dailies, and while I'm there I see a hunter trying to tame Skarr.  I asked if they needed help and they said yes, so partied up with them and helped them get it down and when they died from Skarr, I managed to tame it while they were running back. Man were they pissed LOL.  I nearly wet myself laughing.

Then when I zoned out I saw Ban'thalos and there was another hunter looking to tame it.  An Alliance one.  I flew up and managed to land on the tree next to him and killed the owl LOL.  Epic.  Sucked in Alliance trash.

Time to queue for a few dungeons.  Needed some more justice points to buy stuff to sell.  You can make good gold there by needing everything.  Greens sell well and the blues I just vendor.

Around lunchtime, I thought I'd have some fun in LFR.  Looting sucks now, because you only get 25 gold and I can't roll need on everything anymore - used to be a great way to make cash as well.  I used to laugh at all these assholes who were doing 7k DPS and then whining that I had taken the item that I wasn't even going to use.  Why would I let you have it anyway?  I'm the one doing all the work here, I deserve to get gold for it.  Anyway, so I decided to have some fun and I pulled the side mobs the first time and then feigned death when the mobs came and people started hitting them - funny as, the whole raid wiped.  I got kicked after that.  Came back to a different one and misdirected mobs to one of the healers and they died LOL, it was pretty funny seeing the mobs in the raid.  That kept me occupied whilst I was eating.

Wow is it 2pm already?  Time to do some PvP.  I really need these wins, and f*** there's some people here doing crap ass DPS.  I yell at them to start doing more DPS and they can't even hold their nodes.  What dumbasses.  I held my node against 4 alliance.  And I was the top DPS in the BG as well as having the most kills.  Geez, I'm always carrying these dumbasses, I don't know how they win any games when I don't play.  Horde would suck so bad if it wasn't for me.

I went to Uldum and saw someone doing some quests.  I tagged all his mobs and killed them LOL coz I was trying to get some herbs from there.  Too bad fella, don't do your quests around where I'm trying to farm next time.

Jumped onto my alt who's a skinner and went down to get some dragonscales - this guy was farming stuff and AoE looting so now I can just ninja skin everything!  Saves me the work of killing them :)  Managed to pick up heaps that way before he noticed me and started sending me tells.  Hahaha sucked in for you leaving the corpses behind.  I left you a couple anyway, so ungrateful.

Sucks now that we're not raiding.  I might as well just sit in trade and spam some Anal stuff.  That s**t cracks me up sometimes.  And some people get really snarky about it too - if you don't like it just leave trade chat LOL.

Well that was a good day.  Got a new pet, made some gold, and capped my honor points.  Wonder what I should do tomorrow?









19 comments:

  1. LMAO. This was good. The only thing to add would be ganking lowbies in Stranglethorn or a starting area. Sad that people can't always play nice but luckily the real jerks are few and far between.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I was going to put that, but I thought Gurubashi would have its share of 85s hanging out there so not as much fun. Ty Tyldres for reading my silly tale! :D

      Delete
  2. ROTFL!!! NO! Not leaving the Livegiving Seeds! Not! I shall seize your neck like that of a goose!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Replies
    1. I am sure there is some other trolling stuff that is really annoying - just couldn't think of anything that was really typical turd behaviour.

      Delete
  4. Too funny, Navi! :)

    This reminds me of my recent awful LFR experiences which also includes griefers, a shiny banhammer, and a very funny GM letter. I'll have to post it sometime, but in the meantime I'll think of your story if I run into these kinda folks again! :p

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't remember a post about that on your blog... off to look.

      Delete
    2. Oh no, I haven't yet posted...but your story reminded me that I need to! :)

      Delete
  5. Navi, this post is brilliant. You know, to beat the asshats, perhaps we all need to think like one, so we can keep one step ahead!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Maybe my next post will be the Sherlock Holmes book on smarting asshats lol :)

      Delete
  6. Great read Navi. For a minute I thought you might be channeling that hunter from your LFR run the other day/night. You know, the one who couldn't control his "new" pet. lol

    ReplyDelete
  7. This post reminds me of so many people...

    ReplyDelete
  8. LOL. Absolutely brilliant, Navi! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. TY Saya! I hope we can just laugh at those nasty bullies!

      Delete
  9. Ahh, this attitude makes me cringe so much. You have hit the nail perfectly on the head with your tale. Love it!

    ReplyDelete