Highlights of the Week from my Blogroll March 4, 2012

Well, the Highlights from my Blogroll this week all seem to revolve around a common theme.  And nothing gets the heart and mind going like a good going argument with some passion behind it.

Indignation was the one behind my post earlier this week (When is your say less important than what others say?) which I kept anonymous to an extent but really, anyone who read it knew whom I was talking about.  The only thing I didn't mention was who the person who made the comment was...

Oh stuff it, I'm using names now, everyone knows who the hell I'm talking about.

The only thing I didn't mention was the person who made the comment on Bear's post about his 2 million pageviews. That comment resulted in him removing the post with a small apology/explanation.  Only after posting my little piece of mind, did I go to my blogroll and go through all the new posts in the last 24 hours.  And I came across a post by Oestrus.

Now, when you READ people's writing, you think you get to know the person.  As in, you read their words, and you get a feel for what kind of person they are by how and what they write.  Obviously, because I tend to have a few favourite posts from bloggers, I tend to think of their personalities and traits from those posts.  Oestrus is someone whom I've admired for bravery to come out with difficult things about herself and share them with the world.  Not for atttention, but because she feels it had to be said and maybe she didn't want people to be misled about her.  Azeroth Apple did a similar thing, and I greatly admired that post too.  Oestrus is not someone who keeps her mouth shut and will write whatever she feels, and admires a good discussion.

Oestrus wrote a really good post (Shameless) which was about how people should blog for the right reasons and that people shouldn't self plug as it can put off other bloggers who may give up blogging because those posts make them feel "What's the point?"  Her post was prompted by Bear's post.  And the initial part of her post was good, until I got to the next bit when I realised that whom she was talking about.  In O's defence, she did not say that particular blogger was self plugging, but I think she was saying that sometimes it is really annoying when people shout their achievements in your face, but it does depend on how you say it.  I personally have no issue with people who yell out their achievements, in fact I like it because I do it too.  I'm not doing it to say "Ha, take that, I'm better than you!" because I did all the achievements for ICC and got my mount, I'm just excited because it's something I wanted and I was proud of it.  The only thing that DOES bug me is people who go around yelling on Twitter "I ranked #x on this fight, I did 50k HPS hell yeah on XYZ fight" and that irritates me.  I find those comments annoying because they really ARE comparing themselves to everyone else and saying how great they are.

Mataoka of Sugar and Blood, wrote a response on her blog and also on O's post.  Like me, I think it was Matty's first time writing on O's blog (I could be wrong!).  And Effraeti, whose blog I also frequent, also was prompted to comment on O's post because of Matty's post.  Her response was really well written - almost a blog post on it's own.  I can't link it so I'm going to show it:
I am fairly new to the WoW Blogosphere compared to many of the Blogs I read regularly, and so despite my elation at “Wow! My most views EV-er!” on certain days, I know that there are far more people elsewhere – people who may have never seen my Blog or just did not click with it or me to view it regularly.


I do not believe this reflects on the quality of a Blog.


I write mostly for me, as others say, a journal of sorts. Sometimes I wish for feedback – that others agree or disagree, but mostly I write to get the thoughts out of my head and into a form allowing better analysis. Honestly, if I really want feedback, I suppose I should more obviously ask for it. :)


Now that I have those who visit regularly, I do not see it as extra pressure, but as further motivation. I recently lost my job a week ago, and lost ambition to write, partly because I was afraid it would merely be negative.


But I realized that the connections I have developed in the community were not affected by my RL – they were still there, they were still listening, they were still writing. So in this time where I am feeling cutoff in RL, I can maintain my online relationships until I can feel strong enough to step back into forging new RL connections.


I guess what I am saying is I think we all write to be heard, to be understood, to know we are not alone – especially through a medium where we feel safe, like the anonymity of a Blog. But I agree that is not the reason to start a Blog. Start a Blog because you feel you have something to say, something you do not know how to express elsewhere, something that will only stop torturing you once it is down and visible, even if no one but you ever read it.


Being read is an added bonus.
It was so good in fact that it caught the attention of the Bear himself.  But Matty's post was about writing for yourself, and not for others, and that writing was a cure for the insanity of her soul.  Though I did recall one time where Matty was worried she offended someone with a post and was apologising for it, and I have no idea to this day what she was talking about.  And that itself was like what happened with the Big Bear Butt too, he wrote what he was feeling, and didn't think that what he'd written would actually offend someone.  But Matty apologised for the insult, but didn't remove the post, like Bear did.  I think.

Godmother, also had to put her say in, she merely cautioned that if you hit PUBLISH, you should be happy with what you wrote.  She said that what you write you should be happy with and you should not be changing it to suit one or two disgruntled people, but make sure before you go hitting publish when you're brimming with heightened emotions, you read CAREFULLY what you write, because once it's out, it's out, and you can't really take it back because this is the internet, and nothing goes missing.

Gnomeaggedon, in my opinion, was a bit late to the party.  Ever since Bear wrote his post, I expected his bestest buddy, his blog brother to rush to his defence with all the passion and vehemence that he writes with.  For if you ever read Gnomey's blog you know he holds no quarter, and pulls out all the stops.  He's controversial, he's in your face, he's brutally honest and he doesn't care if you love him or hate him, he would never back down from a good fight.  It's no wonder his blog is all about PVP.  So 4 days later, after the drama, he posts his 96% Spam, 4% Ham, which if you didn't read the post you wouldn't realise it was actually to do with what happened earlier in the week.  And he openly disagreed with what Oestrus said, but as I said, it was to generate a good battle, not to start a spitting match.

Unfortunately, something which neither side really wanted, was hate mail and nasty abuse.  Well except Gnomey who welcomes it as a challenge.  The whole saga was supposed to be opposing points of view, to generate discussion, and I think everyone should remember that hate slinging is not really called for.  Neither of the original parties was hating, just merely stating their points of view, and disagreeing with other points of view.  Supporters of both sides are on my blogroll, people whom I like, I follow, I admire.

But there are positive posts from O's post.  Tank Like a Girl, who now writes Live Like a Nerd, said that:
Oestrus recently made a post that resonated with me. Pageviews really do not matter, as long as you put your heart into your blogging. I intend to do just that. I still get excited about every single comment though. :-) I don’t understand this new trend of 2012 of commentless blogs, because it’s not about writing into the void for me, it’s knowing that people read, enjoyed or disagreed. That’s the power of blogging for me.
Which is what I think people should take away from O's post.  Write for yourself.  Pageviews shouldn't stop you from writing if you have none.  But that doesn't mean you can't get excited about them because I certainly get excited if people like what I write.  After all, what writer doesn't like their stuff to get read and to touch people, right?

If I disagree with something, I don't go around hating.  But I am entitled to my point of view.  And I respect everyone with something to say.  But nobody should go around hating or abusing or spitting just because someone doesn't think the same as you.  And I just hope everyone remembers that.  The debate this week really was entertaining and thought provoking, but poop slinging and flag burning is just that little bit too far.  So, more opinions!  But less mindless hate!  And we will all live happily ever after and still be friends.

And World Peace Will Prevail.  Umm.. yeah :P

PS: Oh, and I forgot to say that I was super excited this week that Hugh of MMOMelting pot linked me TWICE this week.  That just goes to show, that sex sells.  /wink
All in all, this was a really good blog week.  It's been hard to tear myself away from the blogroll and the New post page.

Comments

  1. Hey Navi, Thanks for linking in Oestrus - a massive amount of HPriest info for me to absorb for Dasal.

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  2. I was unable to post my thoughts about this. I was happy to notice in a comment to you, Gnomeaggedon also suffers from the fuckityfuckityfuckity disease that I too have. I lose my words when I have strong feelings about a subject but unlike Gnomey usually no passage of time helps so it's best I remain silent.

    I read Matty's, Effraeti's, yours and Gnomeaggedon's posts and comments and was so happy that while I was stricken with the fuckity disease you all spoke for me with actual words when I couldn't and I was so grateful.

    Thank you and /hugs to you all.

    ReplyDelete
  3. @Mabaho - I'm glad you found that link useful for your spec
    @Matty - :D
    @TotA - Oh dear, I couldn't help but laugh at your fuckityfuckity disease. I knew you would feel the same way, but I am not angry at Oestrus, I do respect her point of view, I just think it's wrong. After all, I am a Bearfan, an affliction you suffer from also.

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  4. Your coverage of this unfortunate incident was so complete, I learned things I hadn't seen before.

    I am still completely bummed by the whole thing.

    What has bothered me the most is how the intent of OOs post seemed to be to provide encouragement and support for new writers that may not be established yet, but it was phrased in ways that made parts of it divisive to at least part of the community.

    In this case, while she did make a disclaimer about not trying to hurt anyone, the examples she used had some pretty powerful connotations. By talking about posts concerning pagehits as boasting, and likening it to bragging with a crowd about how many people you slept with, a specific image emerges of the kind of person that does those sorts of things. It is not a kind or flattering image, and I don't think that it's my imagination alone that is conjuring it.

    Is anyone doubting it was my post she called a 'misinterpretation' on twitter? I interpreted what she wrote as having been inspired by posts about pagehits, and thinking people who wrote such posts were bragging, boasting asshats. If that was a misinterpretation, then I darn well misinterpreted.

    Now, maybe my post wasn't one of the ones she had seen recently that irritated or offended her. I’m so vain, I probably thought that post was about me. It is only my assumption based on timing, and my arrogance that leads me to think she was talking about me.

    That, and the fact she did not say who exactly she WAS talking about.

    If she had someone that she specifically thought of as an example, naming that person or persons in my opinion would have been great, because then only that person would feel called out for their behavior.

    By saying she was inspired by recent blog posts in general bragging about pagehits, but not naming exactly whom she was thinking of when she wrote it, any writer in the WoW blogging community could then walk away feeling much as I did, that they were the one guilty of giving her offense.

    In the end, there was one very important lesson I think that any blogger should carry away from this whole thing

    If you are going to publicly write about the behaviors or actions of other people that pisses you off or offends you, be specific. Hurt only one person, not one hundred. And if you are not willing to attach a name to what you you just wrote, then what you are going to write may be more hurtful than you really want to be, or to be held responsible for.

    If you yourself wouldn't want that person to know you were talking about them in this way, then don’t do it.

    If you've got a great point, or advice or encouragement to give, maybe you can find a way to do it without attacking other people for what you assume their intent was.

    I personally still feel very hurt about the whole thing. I know what was in my heart when I wrote what I did, and to be likened to the kind of person that boasts to a group about the number of partners I had sex with still wounds me a bit.

    I never meant to give offense. When I found out I did, I took action. But I took offense, too.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Errr, guess I posted a bearwall. Umm, I'm sorry?

    look! a cute bear!

    /points at Precious and Soft
    /runs

    ReplyDelete
  6. @BBB - I love comments. Even comments that are longer than my posts :P
    I promised Ancient that this post was the last I would say on the subject, but I have to reply. I look at your original post and know you didn't mean to upset anyone or brag (after all, readers, if you don't like it, don't read it) and maybe O didn't mean to upset anyone when she was trying to encourage new bloggers. What I think MAY have happened is that O was as guilty of doing the thing she accused you of - letting out her thoughts without considering the feelings of others. You spoke happily of your achievement not knowing people would feel inferior, and she spoke how annoying it was, not realising people would think she was calling you a braggart or worse, a self plugging toolhead. But I don't know, the thing about words, is that they are open to interpretation by others.

    But I know what was in your heart, Bear, when you wrote the original post. And I am sorry you were hurt and bummed by the whole thing, but surely it feels nice to know that having 2 million pageviews also means that you have loyal fans and followers who will rally to your support when things like this occur.

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I hope these comments work! Not sure why people can't comment lately, it makes me sad :(

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